New fish finder flounders
I haven't been fishing in a long time. So long in fact, when someone said the name Clinton they were talking about Bill.
Still, I have a problem with an info-mercial I recently saw touting a new device to help fishermen - the Bionic Fish Finder.
First off the name stinks. It sounds like some super hero who didn't make the cut — Bionic Fish Finder, he can't save the world, but he can find you a fish.
But it's not even that good, in fact it's some black box with an LCD screen that "will change the way you fish," according to its web site.
Now like I said, I'm not a fisherman, but it sounds like it's just a mini-version and name change of a regular fish finder.
You take the box on the boat, drop a transducer in the water, and, voila, some high frequency sound waves tell you exactly where the fish are located up to 100 feet.
Two "easy" payments of $19.95 plus $7.95 shipping and handling, and you are as good as the bass pros on TV.
Or not.
It's like instant replay in baseball, sure it might help, but what makes the game interesting is everything is decided by humans — no clocks, no replay boxes, no bionic umpires.
Of course technology and equipment updates have affected every sport. Baseball gloves in the 1920s were like wearing an oven mitt.
Boats, poles, and bait have improved during the years, but it doesn't mean a mini-robot needs to travel along and point out the fish.
When I used to fish with my grandpa and uncle in Virginia, the best part of the afternoon was sitting in the boat, talking about who knows what, and waiting for the line to pull.
Once it did I would pull it out of the water only to find some pop can or pile of seaweed.
Sure it makes sense for serious fishermen who have nice boats to use a fish finder and not have their time wasted.
But the info-mercial shows Dad and Junior out on the boat rejoicing after a catch because their lives have been altered by the BFF.
It seems to take the whole idea of spending quality time with dad, and pun intended, drowning it.
The next time I finally make it out to the lake to go fishing, I'll plan on trying to find the fish on my own.
At least I could save my $47.85 and spend it on a new pole.
